<sub>i am back in the busy environment of university and i couldn't be happier. if there's a slow-down in work posted here, trust me, it will pick up in a major way soon enough. i am learning studio lighting this semester and could not be more excited to start learning. my other classes are as well interesting, ranging from business to biology, but studio lighting is grasping my heart and refuses to let go. i have pages and pages of writing i've also done over the summer and my short time here, but i don't know if i am yet comfortable enough again to post my words. there are relentless eyes that follow when they think they watch unnoticed. all in all, i am as happy as could be returning to this environment. there is so much life and energy here - i am diving into another year with a full heart and a well-worn smile. you can keep up with my "time capsule" of sorts here. i'm keeping it to watch the progression of my work; personal, professional and academic, over the next four years. i'll be posting things there that i may not post here, small assignments and practice work mostly. atlas magazine's first issue will be released on september first as well, and their second issue submissions start the same day. the second issue's theme is 'dreams'. i am so excited to release the exploration issue, there is some truly incredible talent between those pages.

i hope you are all wonderful, happy, safe and smiling.</sub>

_{i am nearing the end of my summer holiday and am preparing to return to the overflow of life and energy that is university. these past few months have been unbelievable. i have continued to adjust to the changes life throws at me; some moving out, a bit of moving forward and moving on from where life was to where life can be. i was lucky enough to shoot with some incredible people this year and have some wonderful opportunities to shoot for designers and for the love of it. my heart is filled with love to the very brim every day. i have awoken with the sun almost every day this summer and between shooting and editing have kept myself busy with writing tutorials and starting up atlas magazine. i want to reach the stars and one day to become intertwined within their light. alas, the sun sets too fast and when it hits the earth i wait for a new day. the sun is setting on this summer to begin a new school year, so with one moment's ending comes the next great thing. i'll be spending the last bit of time i have hurriedly trying to capture every thought, every moment, every feeling before the day is done. i'll be leaving in little under two weeks for my next adventure. i hope you all have enjoyed my recent work; hopefully second year produces even more pieces to share.}

atlas magazine is looking for your work. you have until august 20 to submit your wonderful work, but the sooner, the better! the theme for the premiere issue is exploration, and we're looking to publish your gorgeous words and creative expressions! send your submissions to theatlasmagazine@gmail.com to be considered. i know there are some amazing writers on here, please don't be shy.

facebook.com/theatlasmagazine

<sub>myself and a few other wonderful photographers from around the world have united to create a small online publication named "atlas magazine". click here to keep up to date with the publication. it is a seasonal online publication for the new generation. focused on internationality, diversity and worldwide fashion. showcasing talents in writing and art. coming soon!

also, follow me on instagram @meganbreukelman</sub>

<sub>my goodness, it's been a while. so much awaits on the horizon and many wonderful moments have come and gone. last month held six wonderful shoots for independent designers and submissions, which are all starting to be released. i can't wait to share some of the work sitting here, begging to be seen. this summer has treated me kindly with new freckles, loud laughs and quiet kisses. although i wish i could find more time for nature photography like last summer, this year has taken me spinning in all sorts of new directions i wasn't expecting to move; but so glad it's taken me there.

i've been much less frequent with posting writing, but that doesn't mean it's not there. there are simply certain things i no longer wish to share in an online presence (at least as frequently as before). i'd like to put my writing in another space, but keep it rather private - you never know whose eyes are following.

how have your summer months been?</sub>

<sub>i realize it's been a while since a real update, but i promise there is much to look forward to. i've been back in ontario for just over a week and have been running about trying to see the people that i love and do everything that i can. i've also managed to get a few photo sessions in here and there, and there are more to come! this weekend i have two couples shoots and one shoot for an accessories line (which i cannot wait to talk about, the photos are going to be so beautiful), and next week i'll have a shoot for a clothing line.

this is a little nothing video i made while crossing america (florida to ontario) on my road home from school. nothing special, i just wanted to share some of the sights. you can watch it here if you wish. i'm hoping to make at least one short film this summer, and to try and make a shoot film of one of the upcoming sessions.

much to look forward to in the coming weeks. stay tuned!</sub>

_{please watch my short nonlinear film for my portrait of isolation project here. please leave a comment on the video if you can, it would mean a lot and be very helpful to me.}

sentimental and warmth photoshop curves

happy easter to those who celebrate, and beginning of spring to each and every one of you. i have three weeks before i am back to real life, and there is much excitement to come of it. in may i have multiple shoots lined up with independent designers and i can't wait to start working on my portfolio again! much of my summer will be dedicated to portfolio building and working with fashion photography.

alright - the photoshop curves. yesterday i reached 200,000 page views and i wanted to express how truly grateful i am for the support i have received time and time again. so, i've decided to give away to one person two of my handmade photoshop curve sets for photos (you can see examples of before/after above). they're very special to me so they must be used wisely.

to enter to win the curves, all you have to do is like my fanpage on facebook and write in the comments section of this journal about how you first got into photography. it could be the story of your first camera, what you did for your first photo shoot, or what inspired you to start taking photographs in the first place. one of the stories will be picked to win the curves. the winner will be announced on april 14, 2012.

good luck, and have a wonderful week!

for the final project for my studio classes of my first year of university, i will be undertaking a photo series - a portrait of isolation. it will be a running photo series (at the end of which, i will choose a select number to use) on isolation, depression and anxiety. a lot of work is going to be put into this series, and it will be self portraiture. there will be a lot of dark photos being uploaded over the next couple of weeks, and perhaps some dark words as i delve further into this work. any feedback and critique you can give the work is highly appreciated through this journey.

on another note, my summer plans are shaping out wonderfully. i have many shoots lined up for different designers and models, and i can't wait to get started on them. it will be a nice change from the darker work i'll be doing before i return home. so, so soon.

_{my short film "changing seasons" is now on youtube - please leave a comment there. it's being used as an example so i would appreciate some feedback. click here. :)}

divorcetension spills across the table in
milky puddles.
condensation glides through
the furniture-dotted rooms
leaving sticky perspiration
spider webbing across door frames.
in isolated claustrophobia,
faint plum coloured wine tattoos
polar white shag carpet.
it spins tales of drunken nights
with too many words released
from the safety of vertebrae
to the eternal location nestled
behind widened retinas.

years pass, and choppy letters
between strained love
still avoid those phantom conversations;
skirt around the stains like the
plague.
perhaps, if you refuse to
acknoweldge its existence
it never happened.

[but it did.]

i don't know how to write right now, so i let other words do it for me.

<sub>happy valentines day to all of you, with or without a significant other. many people dislike the celebration of valentines day - and i cannot seem to find a reason. i have found myself on the "anti valentines day" road before, but life has shed new light for me. i have found love, hope, magic in another person. but valentines day is not simply a celebration of the love one has for their significant other. it is a celebration of love. love is not defined in such a rigid term, as one loving another. love is the feeling of truly caring for someone in your life - love is found in friends, in families, in yourself. it is found in the little things you do every day that make you who you are. valentines day is a celebration of love, so celebrate it. tell your family you love them. tell your best friend they mean the world to you. tell a stranger they are beautiful. make the most of those people in your life you couldn't imagine not knowing; make the most of loving yourself. happy valentines day.

by the way - whoever sent me the anonymous deviantart valentines, thank you so much.</sub>

i know this is an issue that has been raised many times, but i feel like it is one that is important to be aware of. i have been looking in the newest section of deviant art for the past few days, rather than just skipping to the popular deviations. i've been hoping to find little photo gems within them, and occasionally, i have found some. i cannot help but to notice, however, that every third picture is pretty much pornography. not nude art - don't get me wrong, i have absolutely no issue with nude art. the human body is something beautiful that can be so wonderfully captured in the photographic medium. but taking cell phone pictures of your junk, or holding a camera up to a mirror as you flash your tits, is not art. it's cheap pornography. there are many debates as to where the line between nude art and pornography lies. i understand that there are going to be some people to use the deviantart system this way, but really? when every third picture is a poor quality snapshot of genitalia that someone took in their basement one lonely night, there's something wrong here. what is your opinion? where do you think the line between nude art and pornography lays? sorry for the rant and the minuscule bit of crude language, it's just something that's been quite bothersome over the last little while.

_{coming home this weekend was a time of both joy and sadness. i lost a very special relative, unfortunately, yesterday morning which created a very deeply saddening turn of events. it is so upsetting that i must return to school in a time where my family, as a whole, feels much pain. she lived a beautiful life, and i am confident that she is at peace now. the main reason for my return to canada this weekend was for an interview for a summer internship - something i'll be hearing back from in the next little while. until then, fingers crossed. as well, i was able to see my real life sweet dream, and he helped me through many tears and brought out smiles in the last day or so. my photos for pink martini collection's spring lookbook are now on their website - pinkmartinicollection.com, so you can take a look if you get a chance. more will be released on here over time. i don't know if there will be a lot of writing or very little writing to come in the next little while. there are many things in life right now to be dealt with. sometimes i truly believe that when it rains, it pours; but i am also with the strong belief that after the storm comes the sun. i'm sorry for the vent - airport ramblings at a much-too-early time of morning (or much-too-late time of night, depending on your sleep schedule). for now, i will be far above the clouds before i can curl up in my cozy dorm bed once more. i wish each and every one of you all of the best.}

<sub>your absence has gone through me like thread through a needle. everything i do is stitched with its color.
– w.s. merwin

what made you smile today? tonight is a night where i cannot sleep. the end of the week is fast approaching, building to a very important day for me. i will be back home for two days for some (hopefully) good news. this also means i get to take photos for a very short time in the beautiful snow before heading back to school again. it will be a brief visit home, but is sure to be memorable nonetheless. more to come on the end of the week if all turns out well. school right now is marvelous; becoming a bit busier as the weeks run on. i have posted less writing lately, but i promise it's there. it's enclosed in the pages of a small leather book and i don't know if i'm ready to let go of some of the words yet. i hold them too close, as they are everything i am in each moment they are written. charlotte rose has also become a series of cold whispers i hope to bind into a book for myself someday. for now, i am going to hope for sleep to get the best of me. i hope you are all very well.</sub>

<sub>there are so many people - so, so many people in this world who are just as scared and just as insecure as you are. they may look confident; they put on a smile every day, they can take charge of a room. that doesn't mean that they don't have their own battles to face, just like you. little or small, everybody has demons. sometimes, the only thing we can really take comfort in is the fact that we are never alone. that simple fact alone is what gets us through our darkest days and out into the light again. we are never alone in this life, regardless of circumstance, and it's something that should never be forgotten.

reading all of your comments on my polls for tell me a lie and something most people don't know about you made me realize - everyone's in the same boat. whether they appear to be or not, we are all in the same boat. but we are rowing to shore together. it's okay to feel down sometimes, and it's okay to take comfort in the fact that you are not the only one. we're all in this together. make every second count of this year, and all of those to come. i hope the new year is going to be amazing for each and every one of you.</sub>

<sub>do you get snow where you live? i am so thankful to have come home to cold weather, and to be currently in an area with lots of snow. do you get snow where you live, and if you don't, would you want it? i know some people who have never seen snow. have you? i'm intrigued.

crooked fingers - heavy hours. currently my favorite song. listen to it if you'd like to hear a heart breaking.</sub>

unless you've had your head under a rock for the past twenty-four hours, you know of the unfortunate passing of one of the greatest visionaries this world has seen. mr. steve jobs was an inspiration for so many; somebody with so much drive and ability, and somebody that changed the world that we live in. i grew up on apple computers. my father would sit me in front of screensavers to put me to sleep some nights. a gift for my seventh birthday was a pink apple computer, so i could play kidpix (a drawing program). i've watched the progression of the apple technology throughout my whole life. so i sit here, on my macbook, mourning the loss of a genius, a visionary, an icon. thank you, mr. jobs, for everything you have given the world. thank you for the inspiration and life you have filled so many with, sharing your wonderful visions and bringing them to life. you will continue to be an inspiration for years and years to come. such a sad event is a sobering reminder that life is short. it is a gift much too precious to waste. it is the people you love and the things that you do that will keep you safe and warm for all of your days. being the richest man in the cemetery doesn't matter to me. going to bed at night saying we've done something wonderful, that's what matters to me. - steve jobs. he left this world much too soon, but left it a changed place because of his wonderful life.

rest in peace, mr. jobs.